here's one from the archives of why most people don't like me:
my husband and i walk to the gym before 6:00 every morning. it' dark, cold, i'm tired. all of a sudden, a car pulls up long side us in a creep manner. we're on campus where jon works so there are no people around and i'm incredibly paranoid so naturally i find this alarming. an older woman driving with two people in the car rolls down the passenger side window, where i stare at her.
her: We're looking for University hospital
me: So....? (then i turn and keep walking)
jon gave her directions.