making our own hot sauce. out of those peppers, yes, those ones right there!UPDATE- the smell in our house now burns the nostrils, and yes, we have our own homemade so-hot-i-can't-eat-it hot sauce.
12.07.2008
this weekend
making our own hot sauce. out of those peppers, yes, those ones right there!UPDATE- the smell in our house now burns the nostrils, and yes, we have our own homemade so-hot-i-can't-eat-it hot sauce.
12.05.2008
blogging from liberty city
here's today's lineup:
i go to a payphone where a mystery man tells me to kill the man on the boat in the canal by lowel street. he provides me with a sniper rifle. i take a taxi to the canal overlook, and instead blow up the whole boat with a rocket launcher. sniper rifles are for babies.
i go drinking with my friend dwaine. hes kind of gloomy, but otherwise pretty awesome. we get so drunk i run out into the street yelling, "yellow car, find me!" trying to hail a cab back home. when we get back to dwaine's place in the projects a cabbie hits me with his car in the street, gets out, and punches me in the face. oh, you should not have done that. i shoot him about a billion times with my micro-smg. no one calls the cops because we are in harlem, but it does cause a traffic jam.
i head downtown to meet up with super-gay bernie who appears to be hiding in an alley. but i can't find him and find a yellow lamborghini instead. i steal it out of the parking centre.
i'm up at jimmy pegorino the mob boss's house taking on some more work. they send me out to the old refinery with jimmy and his guys marco and um... whatever that other guys name was in his sweet sedan. the first time i do the mission jimmy doesnt get in the car fast enough and i run him over in the driveway. oops. when we finally get to there i take a position up above to watch the meet go down. the deal goes bad and i have to get to jimmy before they kill him. i'm a terrible shot so the sniping isn't very smooth. after i kill everyone and get the money back i drive jimmy home in the rain. marco and other guy dont make it. he only gives me $10,000 which i think is a ripoff.
i take a break from the serious stuff to take a police car and drive down the sidewalk at about 100 mph sending people flying into the air over my car. on the way i hear a story about a crazy mob shoot-out at a refinery on the radio news bulletin! i'm so famous... and the gps navigator in my new lamborghini speaks with a british accent. classy!
i put my phone on silent and decide to cruise around the city for a while. ive always wanted to rob someone at an atm. such lofty goals. i head down to the meat packing quarter to search for a combat pistol in an outdoor cafe.
i try to pick up a hooker on my way to my next job for jimmy, but come to find out that those girls arent hookers, just sluts standing around talking. so i run them over with my car.
at the diner i initiate a chase with some rival mob members. i follow them back to their AutoEroticar dealership for a major gunfight. i shoot up the dealership with my oozy but they take shelter in the back office. the cops are called and in an awesome turn of events they start attacking the mobsters instead of me! so i get to stand idly by while the cops do all my work for me and then cruise off. wheeee! i don't think that was supposed to happen.
my favorite girlfriend kate calls and lets me know she'll be coming with me to my cousin's wedding- i'm afraid shes going to die in the final mission because i shot one of her brothers.
i can never get a cab in alderny for some reason.
this makes me so happy.
i go to a payphone where a mystery man tells me to kill the man on the boat in the canal by lowel street. he provides me with a sniper rifle. i take a taxi to the canal overlook, and instead blow up the whole boat with a rocket launcher. sniper rifles are for babies.
i go drinking with my friend dwaine. hes kind of gloomy, but otherwise pretty awesome. we get so drunk i run out into the street yelling, "yellow car, find me!" trying to hail a cab back home. when we get back to dwaine's place in the projects a cabbie hits me with his car in the street, gets out, and punches me in the face. oh, you should not have done that. i shoot him about a billion times with my micro-smg. no one calls the cops because we are in harlem, but it does cause a traffic jam.
i head downtown to meet up with super-gay bernie who appears to be hiding in an alley. but i can't find him and find a yellow lamborghini instead. i steal it out of the parking centre.
i'm up at jimmy pegorino the mob boss's house taking on some more work. they send me out to the old refinery with jimmy and his guys marco and um... whatever that other guys name was in his sweet sedan. the first time i do the mission jimmy doesnt get in the car fast enough and i run him over in the driveway. oops. when we finally get to there i take a position up above to watch the meet go down. the deal goes bad and i have to get to jimmy before they kill him. i'm a terrible shot so the sniping isn't very smooth. after i kill everyone and get the money back i drive jimmy home in the rain. marco and other guy dont make it. he only gives me $10,000 which i think is a ripoff.
i take a break from the serious stuff to take a police car and drive down the sidewalk at about 100 mph sending people flying into the air over my car. on the way i hear a story about a crazy mob shoot-out at a refinery on the radio news bulletin! i'm so famous... and the gps navigator in my new lamborghini speaks with a british accent. classy!
i put my phone on silent and decide to cruise around the city for a while. ive always wanted to rob someone at an atm. such lofty goals. i head down to the meat packing quarter to search for a combat pistol in an outdoor cafe.
i try to pick up a hooker on my way to my next job for jimmy, but come to find out that those girls arent hookers, just sluts standing around talking. so i run them over with my car.
at the diner i initiate a chase with some rival mob members. i follow them back to their AutoEroticar dealership for a major gunfight. i shoot up the dealership with my oozy but they take shelter in the back office. the cops are called and in an awesome turn of events they start attacking the mobsters instead of me! so i get to stand idly by while the cops do all my work for me and then cruise off. wheeee! i don't think that was supposed to happen.
my favorite girlfriend kate calls and lets me know she'll be coming with me to my cousin's wedding- i'm afraid shes going to die in the final mission because i shot one of her brothers.
i can never get a cab in alderny for some reason.
this makes me so happy.
12.04.2008
$10 puppy bed = love
bang has evidently entered some kind of new developmental phase. she used to sleep every other hour and play every other hour. all of a sudden on monday- nope, not doing that anymore. this new phase? constant running and jumping. i mean every freaking second. i didn't think that bulldogs could jump very well and apparently i was wrong. or my dog is a bulldog/bullfrog hybrid. she's also a super-ninja who no longer needs sleep, so, that's cool too.
i was at the steps taking off my shoes after work and she jumps from landing on the stairs straight out into my legs for no reason that i can see. except that she's crazy.
12.03.2008
putting the "christ" back in christmas my ass.
i'm going to be a little controversial here because i have to get this off my chest- i can't stand all this "put the 'christ' back in christmas" propaganda out this year. i couldn't agree with this or this more, and i'll tell you why, and then maybe i'll feel less like punching people about it.
the general media switched to 'happy holidays' to be more inclusive to people across the world who are of different faiths- and as someone who works at a Jewish run company, we take that very seriously here. saying happy holidays to someone is not the same as saying, "fuck you jesus, i hate your birthday that isn't even the day you may or may not have been born" it's just saying, "hey, whatever holidays you celebrate have a great one." is that so fucking bad? does it really inconvenience you that much to be respectful to people of all faiths? apparently so.
some people weren't raised with christmas as a "religious" holiday (me) and some celebrate it with family and friends even though they aren't christian (i'm thinking of families here where husband/wife is christian and other spouse isn't). so what do you want all of us to do, not come? christmas can be about more than one thing- it can celebrate the birth of jesus AND celebrate togetherness, family, sharing, and giving. AT THE SAME TIME. because for a lot of people christmas just means giving to others, donating to the charities you can, and being grateful for your family. those sound like pretty christian attitudes to me. i'm sorry, jesus must hate being giving and thankful because he's a selfish bastard who only wants you to celebrate HIS birthday with people who think about HIM.
i'm just the kind of girl that likes to think that hypothetical jesus was a kind person, and that he would approve of any kind of 'christmas' holiday that embodies good spirits and giving. and hanukkah. and atheists. because he was an accepting kind of guy. and it seems backwards to throw a big fit about "christ back in christmas" when all jesus wanted was people to accept and respect each other. i may share a very different outlook on this subject than those around me, but i respect their personal beliefs. and i expect others to do the same, not proselytize their ideas around to the media (cough cough... fox news). that respect is alot harder to hold onto when their opinions are all up in your face.
i guess the argument that some would make is that christmas has been bastardized into a totally commercial holiday and GIVING is not as important as it should be. and that's probably true. there are plenty of assholes out there who celebrate christmas with the wrong intentions. sorry, too bad. what do you want to do about it? bitch? seems like you should probably just spread your damned christmas cheer with a positive giving attitude instead. teach by example, said jesus.
ok, i do feel a little better.
the general media switched to 'happy holidays' to be more inclusive to people across the world who are of different faiths- and as someone who works at a Jewish run company, we take that very seriously here. saying happy holidays to someone is not the same as saying, "fuck you jesus, i hate your birthday that isn't even the day you may or may not have been born" it's just saying, "hey, whatever holidays you celebrate have a great one." is that so fucking bad? does it really inconvenience you that much to be respectful to people of all faiths? apparently so.
some people weren't raised with christmas as a "religious" holiday (me) and some celebrate it with family and friends even though they aren't christian (i'm thinking of families here where husband/wife is christian and other spouse isn't). so what do you want all of us to do, not come? christmas can be about more than one thing- it can celebrate the birth of jesus AND celebrate togetherness, family, sharing, and giving. AT THE SAME TIME. because for a lot of people christmas just means giving to others, donating to the charities you can, and being grateful for your family. those sound like pretty christian attitudes to me. i'm sorry, jesus must hate being giving and thankful because he's a selfish bastard who only wants you to celebrate HIS birthday with people who think about HIM.
i'm just the kind of girl that likes to think that hypothetical jesus was a kind person, and that he would approve of any kind of 'christmas' holiday that embodies good spirits and giving. and hanukkah. and atheists. because he was an accepting kind of guy. and it seems backwards to throw a big fit about "christ back in christmas" when all jesus wanted was people to accept and respect each other. i may share a very different outlook on this subject than those around me, but i respect their personal beliefs. and i expect others to do the same, not proselytize their ideas around to the media (cough cough... fox news). that respect is alot harder to hold onto when their opinions are all up in your face.
i guess the argument that some would make is that christmas has been bastardized into a totally commercial holiday and GIVING is not as important as it should be. and that's probably true. there are plenty of assholes out there who celebrate christmas with the wrong intentions. sorry, too bad. what do you want to do about it? bitch? seems like you should probably just spread your damned christmas cheer with a positive giving attitude instead. teach by example, said jesus.
ok, i do feel a little better.
apartment therapy holiday giveaways
i've been thinking about posting this for a week now, and i'm finally giving in. but if you win something, and i dont, i will be mad. they're giving away 101 items until christmas, drawings every friday. as if i didn't already visit their website enough...
12.02.2008
dream of the day
i had a really crazy dream last night and i woke up suddenly at about 3 am and thought, "must remember, must remember, must remember" but... this is all i remember about one of the most odd dreams i've ever had:
jon stewart (now a repeat offender in my dreams, we've got to stop watching the daily show before bed) is giving me a tour of my own house because he lives in our attic. as we walked upstairs he told me, "jamie, poor people live in the basement, rich people live upstairs." and in dream world this made perfect sense to me and i said "ohhh of course! that explains all the 2-story houses in the suburbs." because somehow people with less money would have bedrooms in the basement instead of above. and then he wanted me to bake him cinnamon-sausage rolls.
there was more that was probably more awesome, but that's all i've got.
jon stewart (now a repeat offender in my dreams, we've got to stop watching the daily show before bed) is giving me a tour of my own house because he lives in our attic. as we walked upstairs he told me, "jamie, poor people live in the basement, rich people live upstairs." and in dream world this made perfect sense to me and i said "ohhh of course! that explains all the 2-story houses in the suburbs." because somehow people with less money would have bedrooms in the basement instead of above. and then he wanted me to bake him cinnamon-sausage rolls.
there was more that was probably more awesome, but that's all i've got.
12.01.2008
fyi
you know how puppies are supposed to nap alot? yeah, not happening.
running, and running, and zipping, and hopping. so much for a nap for me too.
running, and running, and zipping, and hopping. so much for a nap for me too.
holiday recap
well, things were mostly uneventful and not nearly as bad as i had been dreading. mostly. really the only part that made me want to shoot myself was the beds in my parents guest room. they were built in the fires of hell by dwarves with pitchforks and eyepatches. there are two twin beds in there, and you have to jump up to get on them because they are so ridiculously high, and then they are only about 3 ft wide, so there's a fair chance you'll fall out several times in the night and bash your face on the also-too-high nightstand. and they stab your back with needles. horrible, can't sleep, needles. sleeping in my own bed last night may have been one of the best feelings ever.
the other major event of the weekend was big dog biting little dog. his teeth made a little hole punch in her head-skin. it was her fault, he growls and growls and warns her to go away but she is a moron and goes and tries to take stuff out of his mouth. we're attempting to work out a new plan to get everyone to get along but i'm pretty bummed out about it.
there's probably alot more i could say about the holiday, but i caught a cold over the weekend and my day has sucked on from there so i'd rather not elaborate. when i write in a bad mood i always sound like an idiot. so, there's that.
the other major event of the weekend was big dog biting little dog. his teeth made a little hole punch in her head-skin. it was her fault, he growls and growls and warns her to go away but she is a moron and goes and tries to take stuff out of his mouth. we're attempting to work out a new plan to get everyone to get along but i'm pretty bummed out about it.
there's probably alot more i could say about the holiday, but i caught a cold over the weekend and my day has sucked on from there so i'd rather not elaborate. when i write in a bad mood i always sound like an idiot. so, there's that.
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