i just fell down in the office hallway, does that make you feel more satisfied?
what really important is that it's jon's birthday. fuck new years, fuck it hard.
yeah, i said it.
Awesome Babysitter took a vacation over the holidays and since i was out of personal days jon took up the gauntlet and was stay-at-home-dad for the past week and a half. as could only be expected they kicked ass, played games, learned new signs, read books, ate foods, and generally continued on life as normal. oh boy am i jealous, but they got to have some man-bonding quality time, which i suppose i can't be mad about.
i was not invited to this man party/tent-convention either.
more than anything else jon and i are a team, an inseparable duo, and unsurprisingly parenting is more of the same. i
i'm glad you were born, assface. i don't know how i would operate without the other half of my heart. probably not well. there would be blood, pools of streaming, shooting blood. we may be odd and we may be jerks, but we are perfectly matched.
even though you eat sandwiches and oranges. even though you make me watch football. even though you hate video games. even though you don't like chocolate milk (freak!). even though you don't want to watch aliens or the omen or death race with me. even though you're now totally addicted to twitter, which is kind of my fault. even though you're like, old now.
i wouldn't have it any other way.
in official honor of your birthday, i forgive you all trespasses.
as long as you don't steal my cookies,
because then i'd have to kill you.
i know, i know. i'm not good at being serious about this kind of stuff, but you aren't either. it's just not our way. what's a marriage if you can't slip in a few dick jokes? what is there to life if there isn't laughing?
you see what i did there? slip... IN... a few dick jokes...
oh YOU. i quit.
happy birthday, jon. i love you and appreciate you, i really really do.