you only live thrice

March 29, 2013


This week Jude told me his first real joke. I mean he says plenty of things that are jokes, but usually only to me because I'm insane and we're doubly insane when you put our insanebrains together. I would blame Adventure Time but trust me, we were like this before. However until now rarely have his jokes been things you could tell to say, a stranger in the grocery store and expect any kind of reasonable reaction.

I was standing at the sink in the kitchen, diligently rinsing something probably I don't really remember when suddenly Jude ran in from the living room and started poking me in the back of the knee.

"Hey mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Hey Mom! Mo-"

"YES, YES, YES. WHAT." I scrambled, as my left knee buckled and I pitched forward into the sink. "Hi, what can I help you with?"

He looked up at me, with maniacal glee shooting out into space from the whites of his eyes. ".......... Guess what?!"

"I don-"

"CHICKEN BUTT." And then he clutched his stomach and laughed and laughed and laughed and snorted and fell on the floor and laughed again. "CHICKEN BUTT. Mom! Chicken butt! That it! That's what I said. You laugh now."

This wild new fad as continued every hour on the hour three or four hundred times, now with random words inserted after 'chicken' like 'chicken... PEANUT!!!' and 'chicken TOOTHBRUSH!!' because he ascribes to the chapter guidelines of the Gertrude Stein Non Sequitur School of Joke-Telling, just like his mother.

And so it begins.

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